Staying Home
Throughout high school and college I was a nanny. I took care of other people’s children in their homes. I was a sudo-stay-at-home “mom.” Often times I would pretend the baby was mine and it was magical, until 5pm. Reality hit like a ton of bricks and I witnessed a baby being reunited with its mother and the beauty that was witnessed is something I only hoped I’d get one day.
When we got pregnant I knew that I wanted to spend some time at home before returning to work. I knew first and foremost that I am not cut out to be a full time stay at home mom, but I wanted a piece of the pie. Of course I was so niave when I thought I could leave and return to work on my terms.
I was wrong.
So wrong.
You see, I’d spent the last three years saving my sick days and allowed them to accumulate for this very season. I set up my insurance benefits to include short term disability. I approached my administrator with a verity or strategies to satisfy my needs and wants. I had a long term sub lined up to take over my classroom.
What is it that they say about the best laid plans?
Haha.
Straight laughter.
In the end, I didn’t choose my child’s birthday. I didn’t get to utilize the sick days I’d banked. I’m still waiting to hear if my disability claim is approved. I had to fight and resubmit countless paperwork to ensure my FMLA reflected my recovery and doctor’s orders. I was limited in my restart date.
But I wouldn’t change it.
I’m home for the first nine months of my first born’s life. I’m fortunate that I get mornings to wake up slow and soak in the giggles, snuggles and tired cries. It’s finally my turn to be mom. The only person I have to share my babe with is Papa when the workday comes to a close, and that’s enough to make my heart grow three sizes that I don’t mind. I’m no longer someone’s nanny (all those babes I cared for are college students, seniors in high school, and middle school adolescences).
We are still working on estlablishing a route in beyond our feeding schedule, and I’m ok with it. I don’t want to find myself compartmentalized into a strict and rigid schedule that doesn’t offer flexibility. It’s just not my style. I live for variety. I don’t want to ever feel like a baby interrupts our life. Instead, I like the idea that we can continue our normal lifestyle with an extra Jung thrown in. Of course, this is easy to achieve with a young babe that will sleep just about anywhere. I’m not ignorant enough to ignor that things will change and soon we will have a wiggly, then mobile toddler that will have a strong opinion (he is his morther’s child) about adventures.
But you know what,
We’ll cross that bridge when we get there.
For now, we are soaking up this snuggle bug and his willingness to hang with the family’s outing. Thankfully we have tolerant friends that allow us to tote our tiny human along to the brewery and dinner on a regular basis.
So, here’s to perfecting the mom look- leggings, a top knot and a consistently tidy home.
<roaring laughter>
When we got pregnant I knew that I wanted to spend some time at home before returning to work. I knew first and foremost that I am not cut out to be a full time stay at home mom, but I wanted a piece of the pie. Of course I was so niave when I thought I could leave and return to work on my terms.
I was wrong.
So wrong.
You see, I’d spent the last three years saving my sick days and allowed them to accumulate for this very season. I set up my insurance benefits to include short term disability. I approached my administrator with a verity or strategies to satisfy my needs and wants. I had a long term sub lined up to take over my classroom.
What is it that they say about the best laid plans?
Haha.
Straight laughter.
In the end, I didn’t choose my child’s birthday. I didn’t get to utilize the sick days I’d banked. I’m still waiting to hear if my disability claim is approved. I had to fight and resubmit countless paperwork to ensure my FMLA reflected my recovery and doctor’s orders. I was limited in my restart date.
But I wouldn’t change it.
I’m home for the first nine months of my first born’s life. I’m fortunate that I get mornings to wake up slow and soak in the giggles, snuggles and tired cries. It’s finally my turn to be mom. The only person I have to share my babe with is Papa when the workday comes to a close, and that’s enough to make my heart grow three sizes that I don’t mind. I’m no longer someone’s nanny (all those babes I cared for are college students, seniors in high school, and middle school adolescences).
We are still working on estlablishing a route in beyond our feeding schedule, and I’m ok with it. I don’t want to find myself compartmentalized into a strict and rigid schedule that doesn’t offer flexibility. It’s just not my style. I live for variety. I don’t want to ever feel like a baby interrupts our life. Instead, I like the idea that we can continue our normal lifestyle with an extra Jung thrown in. Of course, this is easy to achieve with a young babe that will sleep just about anywhere. I’m not ignorant enough to ignor that things will change and soon we will have a wiggly, then mobile toddler that will have a strong opinion (he is his morther’s child) about adventures.
But you know what,
We’ll cross that bridge when we get there.
For now, we are soaking up this snuggle bug and his willingness to hang with the family’s outing. Thankfully we have tolerant friends that allow us to tote our tiny human along to the brewery and dinner on a regular basis.
So, here’s to perfecting the mom look- leggings, a top knot and a consistently tidy home.
<roaring laughter>
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